Cashew had to check out the dolls. I couldn't resist.
Tuesday, February 23, 2010
the Lady of the
Boudoir. She is one fancy doll and lots of fun to make because she has so much fabric.
Elinor went to town. The ladies have gloves, braclets, hats, jackets, earrings,necklesses, and purses. They also have leg warmers which is a tribute to Elinor's love of the Japanese Street children's clothes. She got a book of pictures of these kids and has just fallen in love with them.
I will try and get better pictures but this was my first try.
Sunday, February 21, 2010
This past Thursday, I went with Elinor to Spokane, WA. Her daughter, Rachel, was being sealed with her husband, Pip, in the Temple along with their two children, Jonah and Harper. Elinor was so happy that she flet she must be there. I went along as driver. We left on Thursday and were to return on Saturday. I asked my great nephew, Thomas, to look after the cat. Thomas has cared for Cashew before so I was not worried. We set off
as planned and returned on Saturday to find that Thomas had not been there. Cashew had not food, no water and her box had not been scooped. I felt horrible for my little friend. I was profoundly grateful that it had only been two days but I can only imagine how abandoned my little cat thought she was.
Today, I must address this issue with Thomas. It is important that he understands that breaking his word is not a good thing. Forgetting is not acceptable. If you have a responsibility, then you have to make sure you do NOT forget. I don't want him to think I don't love him but I want him to understand I am disappointed. I will not ask him to watch Cashew anymore. Breaking a promise breaks a trust.
Saturday, February 13, 2010
"Now, there are those faces. Yes there they are. The faces that somehow I trust. It may embarass you to hear me say but say it I must. Say it I must. You've got those cool clear eyes of seekers of wisdom and truth. Yet there's that bold brave step and that grin of impetuous youth. Oh I believe in you.......I believe in you."
The words are not exact. I am afraid I have forgotten some of them but they still ring true. They were taken from the musical HOW TO SUCCEED IN BUSINESS WITHOUT REALLY TRYING. In the musical, the guy was singing to his reflection in the mirror but I choose to sing it to my dearest friends, my sister, Elinor, and my brother, Ross. They are my mainstays in this life. They get me thru tough times and good times. They are my protectors, my confidents, my pals. They are part of my history. They have known me the longest........all 61 + years. I would be lost without them. Thank you both. You are true blessings in my life.
Wednesday, February 10, 2010
I am looking at all the snow the East is getting and I am sooooooo grateful that I am not there. I truely do not like snow anymore. I was thinking about my friends and family who are enduring the mess when what should I see outside my window but some forsythia blossoms on the tree outside. Little bits of yellow just reaching out to touch my spirit. WOOOOF!!!!! I love it!!!!!!!! There are some croci(more than one crocus) in the front yard. It is definitely coming . Don't be discouraged, You Easterners. I know all you see is white but there are buds and blooms waiting to make their debut. Be of Good Cheer.........the snow will pass.
Saturday, February 6, 2010
I was watching a movie tonight......"Facing the Giants". I have seen it many times. It is a story about a football coach who turns his team around by telling them to play for God and not themselves. It is a tearjerker and of course, I cried. I wondered as I have in the past why this couldn't work for me too. My problem is I don't believe God would do it for me. I don't think I am worth it. I don't trust Him to love me that much.
I am not asking to be skinny. I know that is not reasonable. I just want to stop thinking about food all the time. I want to feel good about myself. That I am not a failure all the time. That I have some worth. That there is a reason for my being here. That I am not just taking up space. Others have told me but I don't believe them. In the movie, the coach asks "What's impossible with God's help?" The answer is "Nothing is impossible with God's help" I know this. I want to believe it. I want to trust it. I need to believe it. Please, God, help me believe it is true for me too.
Tuesday, February 2, 2010
My resolve didn't last for long but unlike the past times, I don't feel like taking it out on me. I use to come down on myself and then go binge but I don't want to do that this time. Elinor and I have decided that dieting is not for us. This doesn't mean that we are going to be idiots about food. We have decided to try and make better choices without pissing ourselves off which is what dieting does.
This past week, I have been so angry that everything feels out of balance. Elinor prayed about it and we have decided to ask for a blessing from Elinor's visiting teacher, Richard. We have decided to incorporate more vegetables in our diet as well as fruit. We have decided to continue going to Curves and to work out in the garden more. In short, this is just our way of dealing with a lousy situation that we put ourselves into. We will not ask God to take this away but to give us the strength and courage to face this sensibly as part of our love for Him. At first, I felt like a failure but now I don't. One day at a time. "God, grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change, the courage to change the things I can and the wisdom to know the difference."
I am no longer alone.